My 2 Cents & I am ....

Jeff Murdock

A-Rated : Not recommended for conservative women, children and my mother :-)

Sometime in late 2002, we decided to watch something else other than Saturday Night Live on TV and we started watching a British Comedy on Channel 8. What a good change!!! The British Comedy happened to be "Coupling"- easily the most funniest thing that I have ever seen since Charlie Chaplin. America till then was obsessed with a certain dude named Joey but Jeff proved that Joey was not nearly in the same class.....The Giggle loop, even now I am wary of it when I am in a serious situation

Sharing Jeff's wisdom ( thanks to BBC)

"I mean, where exactly do you take your socks off? My advice is to take them off right after your shoes, and before your trousers. That’s the sock gap. Miss it, and suddenly you’re a naked man in socks. No self-respecting woman will ever let a naked man in socks do the squelchy with her."

"Only an interview? What if I panic? You know, what if I say an accidental word... there’s pressure, you know, the wrong word could just pop out of my mouth by accident... Nipples!"

"Oh, wouldn’t that be great... being a lesbian. All the advantages of being a man, but with less embarrassing genitals."

"I need breasts with brains. I don’t mean individual brains, obviously... I mean, not a brain each. You know, I like intelligent women, but you’ve got to draw the line somewhere... I think breast brains would be over-egging the woman pudding."

"You know, when I was a kid, I used to write the word 'naked' hundreds of times on a piece of paper, and then rub my face in it."

"This is the curse of Jeff Murdock. I meet the woman of my dreams and I can’t take my trousers off."

"All of us in our time are visited by the Melty Man... Don’t say his name, Patrick. Don’t even think his name, or he will rise from the shadow dimensions to do his evil work inside your terrified pants."

"Steve, it’s a bad idea to actually count women’s breasts. The whole bus stares at you."

"You know what’s great about skirts? When a woman’s wearing a skirt, you know, you know, that somewhere in that room, shifting all the time, there is the VAA: the Visual Access Angle. A clear line of sight back to base camp."

"I am a prison for sperms. Those poor little tadpoles have been sentenced for life in Jeff Murdock’s groin. And let me tell you, that can be a pretty lonely place."

"When God made the arse, he didn't say, 'Hey, it's just your basic hinge, let's knock off early.' He said, 'Behold ye angels, I have created the arse. Throughout the ages to come, men and women shall grab hold of these, and shout my name.'"