My 2 Cents & I am ....

Once in a blue moon on Saturday. Two full moons on the same month is a very very rare occurence. It happens only 40 times during a century.Phraseologists have coined the often used term "Once in a blue moon" to indicate this rare event. The full moon on this Saturday is a blue moon. Glance up the night sky on Saturday to get a glimpse of this truly infrequent event.

In Search of a new home

I saw these fotos in Reuters today. On one side were the victims of the floods in Bangladesh searching for new homes to rehabilitate their lives. On other side, were the Yankees baseball team who were seeking a new home(stadium) for $700 million dollars. What a huge difference between the needs of America and the needs of the third world.

Support Bihar and Assam

"God cannot be so cruel. We are poor and needy. We work hard to make ends meet. Now he has rendered us homeless. God cannot be this cruel" would be the common lament among the 40 million people ravaged by floods in the eastern states of Bihar and Assam. With over 200 people dead, thousands of lost homes and the lingering threat of an epidemic this year's floods have been particularly massive and are having a widespread devastating impact. In this hour of deep sorrow, the least we can do from far away America to the grief stricken souls, is help. Isn't it better to light a candle rather than blame the darkness?

Association for India's Development Inc. (AID), a nation-wide charity with over 30 chapters has been communicating with our partner organizations and other NGOs in Assam and Bihar over the past few weeks to assess the disaster and assist in the relief and rehabilitation efforts. Relief efforts are particularly essential to
support health needs and essential medicines, temporary shelters. Efforts to ensure access to food and clean water are also of immediate importance. Long-term rehabilitation efforts may be needed in terms of livelihood opportunities.

AID has set up a special fund for supporting relief and rehabilitation efforts and has sanctioned $10,000 toward the fund to begin support of relief efforts. This is just a small as the actual need for supporting our partners' work alone may be four to six times this amount.

With over 22 million people of Indian origin living outside India and half of this 22 million living in the United States, AID appeals to the community at large to contribute significant additional amounts so that prompt relief and a more enduring rehabilitation effort for affected populations are possible. Any contributions in excess of the present need made toward the AID's Relief and Rehabilitation Fund
will be used to fulfill other disaster relief needs on a case by case basis in the future.

Contributions to AID can be made through secure on-line credit-card deductions from AID's website:

www.aidindia.org/AssamBiharFloods/AssamBiharFloods2004.html

where details and updates are available. Please indicate that your contribution is for the relief and rehabilitation fund. Contributions can also be sent by check mailed to:

AID - Zone 3,
P.O. Box 4801
Mountain View, CA 94040-0801
(Indicate "Relief and Rehabilitation Fund" in the check memo)

Please feel free to contribute any amount as at this time of need, even a small amount can make a huge difference.

"What's in a name? That which we call a rose
By any other word would smell as sweet."

After days of Ganth Bashing and Moore loving, I saw a great movie "Autograph". A very realistic depiction. Cheran had done a wonderful job of walking on thin ice and maintaining viewer interest in the film. The film would have easily fallen into the panthenons of the boring art movies had he slowed the pace even a wee bit. I remember a similar practical but very very boring movie of yesteryear's "Veedu" -
which had emotions and sentiments that everyone could identify with but the pace of the movie was too slow. I remember Balu Mahendra would show how the old man( popularly called "Veedu Thatha") brushes his teeth clean and this reel would go for five damn minutes.

More importantly "Autograph" - the title mystified me. Wasn't it apt to name it "Autobiograph(y)" . Maybe the masses would have heard the word "Autograph" and not "Autobiography" which sounds more like a Crichton novel than a Cheran film. He could have named it "Autobiography : Edhu Ungallin Kadhai" just to make sure that it was not an English movie and also attract the village masses. It would have reversed the irritating trend of giving a tamil name and using a english punchline like "Narasimha : The Ultimate Force", "Alexander:Where is Wasim Khan?" , "Vallarasu: Please Run Away" , "Nattamai: Reverse the Judgement" etc etc.

One of my friends was remarking that English films dubbed in Tamil were the best moneyspinners these days. Isn't that strange? Imagine the names of the dubbed movies. Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon - "Padhungum Puli Marayum Pambu", Harry Potter and the Sorcer's Stone- Harry Potterum Mandharavadhi Kallum, Rush Hour- Avasara Neram( you want to piss) , Rush Hour II - Avasara Neram II ( you want to pee),Van Helsing - "Komberimookan", Beautiful Mind - "Azhagiya Moolai", Spiderman - "Ettukal Manidhan" etc etc

Names are the ulimate testimonials to the term "Deceptive Packaging". A guy named "Arokiyasamy" ( God of Health) would be visiting the doctor just as often as you would use the restroom. "Harichandran" ( an Indian mythological character, known for his honesty) will embody the characterstics of "Harshad Mehta" than "Harichandran". Raman will have multiple affairs and Monica might be a virgin for lifetime.

How about nicknames? Nicknames stick on to you like a leech. I have friends named "Oops", "Fider", "Pistol" , "Pop" , "Bellagio" and I don't recognize them if people refer to them by their real names. More mysterious behind the nicknames are stories behind those. Some of them can even be A-Rated. We recently named a friend PKS - "Pall Kutti Samiyar" due to his obsession to get sainthood at an early age. I am sure he sincerely hopes the name doesn't stick on as he approaches matrimonalism as guys atleast the desis,strongly believe that names play a vital role in landing a good wife. A belief stemming from the stories of Palpandis, Poonguzhalsamys etc etc. For non believers, browse through my blog and you can find one such story written by a frustrated soul.

If a certain dude named William Shakespeare ever meets you, send him to me because he wrote in Romeo and Juliet "What's in a name". How untrue when so much depends on your name and when that name is not Romeo Montague?

Yours Truthfully
Nahsradus Hserus

The Moore Machine I watched Michael Moore's "Fahrenheit 9/11" on Friday. What a movie as he launches a blistering attack on the incumbent President and his shabby handling of a great crisis. A bold movie at an appropriate time. Such a movie in India would never see the light of the day. Hats off to the American way of life which gives the freedom of speech.

Arizona Diamondbacks have gone from riches to rags. A world champion team three years ago is now the worst team in Majors. Sorry state of affairs. Schilling left, now the Big Unit will in all likelihood, be exchaging the snake pit for the house that Ruth built, the Yankee Stadium. Next, Yankee-Red Sox clash will probably feature 2001 Co-MVP's Schilling and Johnson having a go at each other. Isn't it funny how much water has flown under the bridge???

You got to be kidding

Here is a chance for all the Lindsay Lohans, Pam Lees, Diazes to join the U.S. Army.This is no spam mail Read it to Believe it.

Comfortably Dumb

I had this wild imagination last night about Vijayaganth(Ganth) starring in Farenheit 9/11.  Ganth would have seen the approaching flight even with this back facing the flight and he would react by flinging a nylon rope from the ground to the needle atop the Empire state building(ESB). He would then make a timely dive from the top of the ESB and catch the wheels of the plane. With all his might, he would then pull  down the aircraft vertically and make it land safely. He would use his extra sensory perception to realize that there is one more threat and order "Tamil Nadu Police" ( whose help would have been sought by  the defence secretary) to throw a huge net close to the Statue of Liberty. Just when everyone is wondering why there is a huge net, Ganth would get to the top of the WTC and wait for the aircraft to fly in. The terrorist would outsmart Ganth and would basically fly in from the other side. Ganth would do a huge somersault and kick the aircraft on its base and the craft would do a million circles in the air but would fall in the net. He would then nab Wasim Khan ( conveniently christened for the sake of luck, supersition and numerology) and hand him over to a Tamil speaking President of United States. Secruity Advisor would then warn him and ask him to be careful with Osama as he is a very dangerous guy. Ganth would reply "Andha Osamava pathu vellai maligaila irrukra neenga vana bayapadalum, aana intha Tamil Nadu polizzee bayapadadhu" ( People living in the white house might be afraid of Bin Laden but not Tamil Nadu Police). He would then walk away in his long coat and thiruvizha cooling glass.

Osama would be in the caves drinking  kalla sarayam ( Illicit Arrack) and watching disco shanthi dance when one poor soul would come and convey the news.  He would then call Ayman Zahiri and the rest of his associates to hatch a plan to get Ganth either alive or dead. Once again all their conversations will be in Tamil with an alien accent. Ganth would get intelliegence pictures of the caves and "joom" into the rocks using MS-DOS and find out with GPS accuracy where Osama is hiding. Ganth expectedly would go all alone and meet the lion in its own den( how apt the phrase is for Osama). After Ganth finishes off all of Osama's adiyals( henchmen) who will be waiting to get hit just like people wait to see the Lord in Tirupathi, he would take the bull by its horns, sorry the beard. At the end of the long tussle where Ganth will make gravity defying moves, Ganth would pull the Osama's beard and to his astonishment, he would find that Osama is none other than his father-in-law with a beard. Ganth would then sermonize his father in law about how he has chosen to sabotage the world etc etc and then finally would kill him.The whole world will praise Ganth's brilliance.

All this might sound brain dead to most folks. But this is not exaggerated even a vee bit. You have no "kloo" about the heights to which logic can be sacrificed. At the end of the whole experience, you are left wondering "Ignorance is such a bliss".

Gravity = 9.11  Defying Newton - Click here

Boston Flee Party

Boston is the site of the Democratic Convention this year. It is a meeting of democrats from different parts of America where John Kerry will be officially named the "Presidential" nominee. The convention features talks by Kerry, Clinton and Rob Kennedy. It takes place in Fleet Center, where Boston Celtics play basketball during the NBA season.

Politics News Article | Reuters.com

If Santa Claus decides to visit me during this Christmas, I would want him to bring along one of this. I am neither a gadget freak or a big music fan, but I would love to have one of the I-Pods. I really think they look cool :-)

Achamillai, Achamillai Acham Enbathillayae( Fear nothing) sang the great Tamil poet, Bharathiyar. The song is often taught in schools and the kids are made to repeat it as if courage itself is an offspring of memorization. But today, the teachers who preach have chosen not to be followers. This heart pounding piece from rediff tells you how cowardly these teachers have been in at the time of need.

Sexiest Man Alive as the Country's Vice President

The Leewinsky's, Flowers and Jones's have a chance to get a mouthful again . :-)
USATODAY.com - 10 things to know about John Edwards

Beat Him, Hate Him- You can Never Break him

The English media has often ridiculed Lalu. This article is a very positive piece of reporting on an astute political brain. Lalu has really stood the test of time and this article is a very rare tribute.

Now showing: Lalu Prasad, MBBS - The Times of India

Oops , we did it again

In one of the most unprecedented blunders( whoa!!!) in reporting, NY Post on its July 6 issue ran an anchor story that President-to-be( I am an optimist and anti-Bush) Kerry had chosen Dick Gephardt( Dick-Who??) as his running mate. I am sure John Edwards isn't as amused as us .For guys who don't follow American politics, it is like reporting Sonia Gandhi has picked Govinda to lead the country. I am not comparing the credentials of Govinda and Gephardt but I am comparing the enormity of the blunders. Gephardt is no mean politician. He champions labor causes and also ran for the Democratic President ticket.

They made a similar error last year when they wrote that Red Sox won over the Yankees in the game 7 of the American League Championship series. Followers of baseball know that it was in fact the Yankees who won and not the Red Sox. I guess the reporter, editor wanted to go the Broadway show that night and decided that Red Sox would win as they were leading after 8 innings. How good it would have been had the Sox actually won, atleast Mr.Grady Little( Boston's coach) wouldn't have lost his coaching job.
 
No newspaper blunder ever comes close to one of my favorites. This one would have made Chicago Daily tribune look like an idiot. They ran a headline in 1948 saying "Dewey Defeats Truman". History would tell you that it was actually the opposite that happened.
 

"Post" Tabs Wrong Horse

We are not Tata, Birla

This is a common lament amongst Indian middle class families comparing their lifestyles to rich Indian families. A man who would have let out this rant at some point of his life is now all set to take over the Birla empire. Priyamvada Birla bequeathed all her property to Rajan Lodha, a chartered accountant believed to be one of her close confidante. Haven't we seen this before in Bollywood movies?? It happens not only in reel but also in real life :-) . Sounds more like a scene out of Michael Madhana Kamarajan. With that fortune, evvalavu pattanikaran kadana adaikallam ( He can pay a lot of loans with that kind of a fortune :-))

Birla will of fortune spins for Rajan Lodha - The Economic Times

Hey! Teachers! Leave them kids alone!

My cousin is in middle school. He carries a pile load of books on his shoulders. He goes to school at 8 in the morning and comes back at 4. He has a shit load of homework to do. He does it until 8:00 and then goes to sleep. There have been days in his primary school when he had not been able to finish the homework due to their sheer volume and I have written some stuff for him in my left hand. Aren't schools supposed to be more fun and engaging???

Many schools have forgotten the old saying "All work and no play makes jack a dull boy". They are merely profit making organizations with an eye for edging out the other school in terms of academic results. Kids are being sacrificed in the deal. They are made to work harder than they can, beaten up for any small mistakes and some have even chosen to take the route of ultimate sacrifice in order to escape from the teachers.

The blame for some of the young kids commiting suicide not being able to cope up with these "concentration camps" also rests with the parents. All parents want their kids to become a doctor or an engineer and are not open to nuturing the talents of the kids. Pressure coupled with Punishment is not the best environment to grow up.

I hope the Government listens atleast to this The Hindu Article-Terror in schools and does something to enforce a stricter rule regarding the dominating and often "Nazi" like teachers.

Jeff Murdock

A-Rated : Not recommended for conservative women, children and my mother :-)

Sometime in late 2002, we decided to watch something else other than Saturday Night Live on TV and we started watching a British Comedy on Channel 8. What a good change!!! The British Comedy happened to be "Coupling"- easily the most funniest thing that I have ever seen since Charlie Chaplin. America till then was obsessed with a certain dude named Joey but Jeff proved that Joey was not nearly in the same class.....The Giggle loop, even now I am wary of it when I am in a serious situation

Sharing Jeff's wisdom ( thanks to BBC)

"I mean, where exactly do you take your socks off? My advice is to take them off right after your shoes, and before your trousers. That’s the sock gap. Miss it, and suddenly you’re a naked man in socks. No self-respecting woman will ever let a naked man in socks do the squelchy with her."

"Only an interview? What if I panic? You know, what if I say an accidental word... there’s pressure, you know, the wrong word could just pop out of my mouth by accident... Nipples!"

"Oh, wouldn’t that be great... being a lesbian. All the advantages of being a man, but with less embarrassing genitals."

"I need breasts with brains. I don’t mean individual brains, obviously... I mean, not a brain each. You know, I like intelligent women, but you’ve got to draw the line somewhere... I think breast brains would be over-egging the woman pudding."

"You know, when I was a kid, I used to write the word 'naked' hundreds of times on a piece of paper, and then rub my face in it."

"This is the curse of Jeff Murdock. I meet the woman of my dreams and I can’t take my trousers off."

"All of us in our time are visited by the Melty Man... Don’t say his name, Patrick. Don’t even think his name, or he will rise from the shadow dimensions to do his evil work inside your terrified pants."

"Steve, it’s a bad idea to actually count women’s breasts. The whole bus stares at you."

"You know what’s great about skirts? When a woman’s wearing a skirt, you know, you know, that somewhere in that room, shifting all the time, there is the VAA: the Visual Access Angle. A clear line of sight back to base camp."

"I am a prison for sperms. Those poor little tadpoles have been sentenced for life in Jeff Murdock’s groin. And let me tell you, that can be a pretty lonely place."

"When God made the arse, he didn't say, 'Hey, it's just your basic hinge, let's knock off early.' He said, 'Behold ye angels, I have created the arse. Throughout the ages to come, men and women shall grab hold of these, and shout my name.'"

Hail Thee Shane "O" Warne
"Warnie Warnie" was the chant, when one of my greatest supporters and best critc, Vani comes in thinking I was calling out for her and asks me to stop being so ecstatic about an Aussie cricketer. Shane Keith Warne- the synonym for controversy- has done it one more time. He equalled Muralidharan yesterday with his 527th wicket. It is incredible because he plays in Australia where the wickets are suitable to fast bowlers and he has a colleague in Glenn McGrath who has 435 wickets himself. Muralitharan plays in the sub continet where the pitches are more suitable to spinners and SriLanka don't have a genuine wicket taker other than him and to a lesser extent Vass. I never got to watch his ball of the century live but I watched the ball that bowled Basit Ali around his legs in Sydney, I don't remember the year maybe my brother does. I can still hear Richie Benaud in my ears - "You wouldn't believe it, he has bowled him around his legs" . Shane Warne was, is and will be a true magician.

Warne - 'I'm proud of my efforts'

Yada Yada Yada

Today is the Baseball All Star Game. I am suddenly reminded of the Seinfeld episode in which George decides to change the way the Yankee uniform looks. See whether you can find the episode in this website of Seinfeld Scripts. For all those folks who dig Seinfeld, this is the place to be.

There is Something about Steffi

Any reminders about Steffi make me yearn for those days in school. This is an advertisement featuring Steffi that is being aired all over the Network televisions these days. I mined the web and found a link to it. I hope you guys recognize the little boy in the commercial

Click Here

A Childhood Crush

Everytime I see Steffi Graf, it is almost like seeing an ex girlfriend. To say I adored her from 1987 through 2000 would be a shameful understatement. I simply revered her. I remember seeing her on the cover of Sportstar(my mom always bought it for me on Wednesdays ever since I began to spell) for the first time in 1987 when she won the French Open. It was love at first sight. I never missed a match of hers on Television in the good ol days of Doordarshan and I never missed a photograph of hers on Sportstar. There were always prayers on the days of her finals and the folks who knew me - knew Steffi and my unabashed love for her. I picked up fights supporting her and crazily even called Gunther Parche(the guy who stabbed Seles) a "patriot". Many a times during my adolescence I have dreamt of dating Steffi. Even now if Agassi ever changes his mind, I am there for you - STEFFI!!!!!


Steffi Graf  was inducted into the Tennis Hall of Fame yesterday

The Making of an American President :Mayor Bloomberg. NY Mayor Bloomberg has crossed half the bridge. He has started the goofups. Had Vajpayee done something similar, it would have made the cover feature of the TIME magazine.

Man Mountain to Miami

Shaq might go to Miami. What a good riddance for the Pacific Conference! I am happy that Mr.Kupchak has moved the immovable. I pity the Florida fans who were relieved after he left the Magic but he has come back to haunt them. Did anyone hear how Lakers shopped around for a coach? A legendary team finding hard to gel offered the job to Coach K of the Duke Blue Devils who refused it and finally had to settle with Rudy Tomjanovich.....

Constipation of Thoughts

Sharapova won Wimbledon, the union budget and the railway budget were presented, but I have not found anything to write about. I have suddenly having a mental block and have not been able to pen anything worthwhile.

Vindicated

For all those people who did not believe my post about Indian Examination, today's Hindu gives you ample proof of the trailas and tribulations of the Indian Examination System . English professor values Biotechnology papers, awards marks liberally

Young Bodies without nutrition are losing their life everyday. India produced grains and food in excess of what she consumed last year but hundreds are dieing due to under nourishment. Will the Governmant take note and release grains to people who are struggling to make ends meet?

Viva Las Vegas

"Cash Out, Cash Out" I screamed this morning while I was woken up. What a rude awakening- the pleasant dream was ruthlessly stopped by the screeching alarm clock which chose a jackpot moment to remind me that it was time to go to work. I was having this glorious hangover of the Sin city.The realization- vacation over, back to work - left a sour taste in my mouth.

Las Vegas, where a temple for Shaguni( for modern day freaks, the guy who wanted to striptease Draupadi in Mahabharata)wouldn't be out of place, is a 9 hour drive from the San Jose- sanctum sanctorum of drudgery and monotony. We took off on Saturday morning after Maria Sharapova showed us more than her looks by winning Wimbledon. The car was gallantly racing up when it hit a road , the pace on which can only be matched by the classic sunday afternoon Doordarshan movie "Veedu"( Just as a clarification, this is the one which comes after the news for the hearing impaired on DD-1.). We dragged and drove and dragged and drove until we hit a free flowing road where I drove as I was in love with the police officer. I was consistently testing the speed radars with a minimum +10 over the speed limit. We reached Las Vegas finally after a tale of traffic jams, twilight zones, late start and missed exits.

Vegas is a city of dreams. I am sure the political activists who read it will be howling at me for admiring the undisputed capital of capitalism, but I cannot hide my appreciation for the creativity of men. Out of nowhere in a place where even Osama would think twice about living, comes a single strip of land which holds sway over everyone who comes across. The only road where you can find the Pyramid right across the street from the Eiffel Tower, gasp wide-eyed at the tall stratosphere and glance wide-mouthed at the dangerous yest seductive curves of Women. If you dichtomize the pulchrititude of women across the globe as ones that are beautiful and ones that are sexy, Las Vegas will lead you to thousands belonging to the latter.

We hit the road, intrestingly named "Strip", and visted "Bellagio"- the target of Ocean and his 11 men's nefarious plans. Bellagio was the nickname of one of my roomies at ASU and the similarity being their respective prosperities. From Bellagio, we hit the palace of a man who quite audaciosuly declared "Veni, Vidi, Vici" and lady luck took the form of Cleopatra to smile at me. I won at 25c slotting machine. I made 100 bucks there. In a fleeting moment of unadulterated egocentricity, I was already making plans to buy Caesar's palace and declare "Vandhen, Villayadinen, Vendraen". Joy was shortlived as I lost my $s to the machine, which like Monica Lewinsky, asked us to insert.

My luck was running out and so was my sleep. We stayed out till 5 in the morning and left to sleep as the sun slowly was waking up from his sleep. The next day began with a sumptuous meal at a multi-cuisine buffet where the number of desserts outnumbered the number of deserts in the world. Driving around in BMW Z4 like Lord Labbakku is everyman's afternoon dream after a good meal. I wanted to live the dream and decided to annex the BMW with a puny investment of $20. As a first installment for the money I put, I got to spin the wheel.. I spun and doubled my fortunes but the BMW reamined where it was. After a few more spins, the BMW was still were it was. After a few more spins, the BMW was still where it was but my money wasn't where it was..

I hit the next casino and lost more. Just when I had given up, I hit the jackpot( in a poor man's parlance) in a relatively nondescrpit location - I don't even remember the name of the Casino. I made close to $150 and I decided to take it easy after that. Played easily throught the night, taking less chances. Aladin was the hotel I enjoyed most. I loved the artifical roofs, the spacious courtyards- it almost took me to the days when I used to play "Prince of Persia" religiosuly. I listened to some live music and slept in a friend's hotel room.

I slept for a little bit and woke up to get back to San Jose. A drive once again punctuated with heavy traffic, barren mountains, veggie burritos and late landings. The drive might have been tiring, the nights might have been long but the experience itself is priceless. Sorry Master Card for borrowing your puncline.

The Queen is Dead, Long Live the New Queen

Yahooo!!!! Wonder Babe Maria was Sharpo(r)va(t) ... She pummeled Serena and won in straight sets... I hope her era has just begun.

French won by Russian, Wimbledon won by Russian... Russia has come back... Isn't time to declare Cold War, United States...The American broadcaster was taking an American angle to her victory saying Nick Bolletri had coached her.....Unimaginable how low these guys can stoop to get the local hook:-)

Maria Sharapova- One Step Closer

Isn't she hot or what? She is playing like a champion. I will have a little prayer on my lips when she goes out on Saturday against Serena, just like I used to during the good ol' days of Steffi Graf.


Serving for Success